Sowing and Reaping

I was really struck by John 4:35-38 this morning during my quiet time. Take a second to read it. In it, Jesus talks about sewers and reapers. I think that there's a skewed view of sowing amongst Christians. Reaping is pretty obvious. I can go to church most Sundays and see reaping taking place, but sowing is harder to see, therefore it's easy to get confused about just what it is.

As I said, when I see someone come to church on a Sunday and accept Christ, that's a very visible example of reaping, so it's easy to think that sowing was someone inviting that person to church. But rarely will someone's first step to God be coming to church. I never see the person who holds the door for someone having a rough day or the person who treats the server like an actual person at lunch, or the friend who shows Christ's love by being a comforter to someone suffering or the family member who has been sharing the Gospel and inviting the person to church for five years only to have them finally go when someone else invites them. Sowing is almost always behind the scenes and it isn't confined to just talking about the Gospel.

And Jesus, in these verses, refers to the sower and the reaper as two different people. The Lord might not allow me to lead to Christ those that I share the Gospel with. Like on my trip, I got to talk about the Gospel with a bunch of people, and not one of them seemed remotely interested at the time, but the Lord might not be done with them yet and I might just be a step in the process. That's the beauty of the Church being a body. We each have different roles and gifts for reaching people. On our own, we might not be able to make any impact, but together we can change the world.

I guess the beauty of all of this is that the Lord even allows us to take part in this process. He didn't have to choose to let us be His method for reaching the world, but He did. He has entrusted us with the most important job in the universe and that's a big deal. And it's pretty awesome to think that even if I don't feel like I'm making a big impact by bringing people into the Kingdom in droves, I'm still playing a part if I'm just being obedient and loving people and sharing the Gospel with them.

The Gospel, Salvation and Whatnot

I'm back for my first domestic post. Sorry it took so long. It's weird how I can make it a point to find time to blog when I'm always on the go, but now that I don't have tons to do, I find it hard to make time for it.

I've actually had some pretty heavy stuff on my mind lately, and after a conversation with John last night, I can't keep my mind off of it. None of this is me trying to answer the questions, I'm just trying to make sense of it all, so feel free to chime in your thoughts.

I'm really trying to figure out the Gospel right now. What is the Gospel? What I always hear preached is that the Gospel is that Jesus died for my sins so that I can be with Him. And what I gather from that is that the Gospel is salvation. But is the Gospel more than salvation? Isn't there more to a life with Christ than just being "saved"?

And to be honest with you, I'm not even sure I fully get salvation? How does one become saved? I keep hearing it preached that saying a prayer doesn't make you saved, but I've never seen it done any other way. And I know that Biblically that can't be the only way to accept Christ because there are tons of Christians in the Bible and there isn't one example of any of them saying any version of "the sinner's prayer."

And really, I can't stand the sinner's prayer because, working in youth ministry, I've seen it be abused as a fail safe and students "get saved" four or five times. I guess in their mind they think, "Oh no, I feel bad for sinning. God must be mad. I'd better say this prayer to make Him happy so I can go to Heaven." Granted, that's a gross generalization, but there is some truth to it. But as much as the sinner's prayer gets on my nerves, I consistently use it when I have an opportunity to lead someone to Christ. Almost as if I feel like it won't count if I stick with Romans 10:9 and they just believe in their heart and say with their mouths that Jesus is Lord, like it's on me to make it official. It's just a lack of faith on my part.

So that's where I'm at currently. I've decided to read through John again in hopes that the Lord will start giving me some answers. I'm not having a huge crisis of faith or anything, but I am trying to figure out what I believe and why right now. And these are really only a couple of the many things I'm trying to figure out right now. Feel free to throw some of your thoughts out there. I'd love to hear them.

Final Thoughts

Well, here I am at the end of my journey. Rome today and tomorrow, then a 19 hour trip home Friday (which I could use some prayer for). I've loved so much of what I've got to see and do these past five weeks. The Lord's favor has been all over me and I've seen it so much in so many little things. Things that I made sure to write down so I could share them later and brag on Him.

I'm not sure what I was expecting to get out of this trip. I went into it knowing that the Lord wanted me to go, but I'm still not sure as to why. But, He has taught me a lot. Tons about myself, and about who He is. I haven't had a huge supernatural experience or anything, I've just known that He's here. It's been pretty amazing.

And on top of the me stuff, I've got to talk about Jesus with a lot of people. For all I know, just one of those conversations could be the whole purpose in me going on this trip.

I appreciate the prayers I've gotten. I'm glad to be able to say that there's nothing that I've done on this trip that I have to keep a secret. That's a blessing straight from God because there were temptations and whatever prayer I was getting definitely kicked in. The Lord was taking care of me.

I'm so excited to see you all again. I'm excited to get back to NewSpring too! I haven't been to church in around three weeks and I can't stand it. I'm excited about American food as well. At some point, someone is going with me to Five Guys next week. Bless their hearts, they try to make hamburgers in Europe, but I'm not sure what happens between the trying and the happening, but it never comes out quite like food.

And finally, I can't wait to get back to Fuse! To be honest, I was getting pretty burned out. I was absolutely ready to quit and not look back, but God's given me a new passion and I can't wait to go full throttle when I get back with my guys.

I'll see most of you all Sunday night at 6 in Greenville, and to everyone else, just give me a call. I'm unemployed now so I have plenty of time. I can't wait to hear what's been going on in your lives this past month.

In Theory

Yesterday I went to the Battistero here in Florence. Primarily because, at the time, the line was shorter than the one leading to the top of the Bodacelli dome of the Duomo. It's a really simple place. It's actually relatively small compared to some of the other places I've been, but still, I liked it.

Inside, there was this series of three statues. A Levite, a Pharisee, and John the Baptist in the middle of them. The other two were staring at John with disdain and John was sporting his camel hair sweater and vagabond look. When I first saw that, my first thought was, "I love how God works." Meaning, I love that God chose the guy in the middle to usher in His son, not the religious professionals. This messy, homeless man was called the greatest of men born of woman. That's pretty huge.

But then it hit me, I'm not sure I really love how God works. I mean, in theory I do. But practically, I don't. I love how God works in other people's lives. How God can take the most messed up people and do enormous things for His Kingdom through them, and how He can so effect a well off, comfortable person that they give up everything they have to follow Him. That all sounds awesome, as long as He doesn't ask me to do it.

The Lord's been revealing a lot of the idols in my life these past few weeks, and I know that comfort is definitely one of them. The idea that God could ask me to give up everything and live the John lifestyle terrifies me. And what's worse is that living in poverty and having people think I'm crazy scares me more than the whole head on a platter deal.

So right now my prayer is that the Lord will reveal to me all of the idols in my life and to help me destroy them. I have no idea what He has in store for me, but I do know that I have things keeping me from fully embracing whatever my purpose is. And until all of these idols are dethroned, I'm not truly free serve God with everything I have.

Parlee Engleese?

So, here's an idea of where I'll be in the coming week. No funny comments as I'm tired and have only a few minutes of paid for internet left. But, needless to say, I miss you all and can't wait to see you when I return. You should probably come to NewSpring Greenville Sunday at 6 so I can see you.

May 2-3: Pisa

May 4-5: Florence

May 6-7: Rome

May 8: Greenville!

Leaving a Legacy

I've talked a lot over the past year or so about leaving a legacy. But, tonight it hit me that I have no clue what that even means. I was out exploring the city tonight and stumbled upon a really old cemetary. Inside were these huge monuments, most of which where from the 1800's. Some even had touching comments on them. In particular, the one that sticks out was to a pastor from his congregation in appreciation for what he meant to them.

But, the thing that gets me is that the monuments in this place are falling apart. They aren't being taken care of. I think the newest one I saw was from 1915, maybe. Nobody visits these people because nobody knows them. Very few people are alive who were also alive when some of these people were, and in most cases, it's been 100 to 200 years since they died, let alone lived.

And, if I think about this in my own life, I have no idea who my great-grandparents where. I knew my great-grandma when I was very young, but just barely. And, if I'm being honest, I have no real desire to learn anything about them, and we're just three generations removed.

So, coming back around to the idea of leaving a legacy, I have to wonder, does leaving a legacy mean being remembered? Really, I thought it did. I had imagined thoughts fondly remembering great-grandpa David as the man who set his family on a Godly path leading to countless people entering the Kingdom of God because of the family line. But that's ridiculous. First of all, that makes it all about me and how great I was. But, more importantly, I'm going to be forgotten. Someday, I'll be gone, and later everyone who knows me will be too. And what's left won't be my name. That won't matter. What will be left, however, will be the ripples I've created with my life.

Honestly, I want to lead my future family in such a way that the Kingdom is enlarged because of it. I want to bring great men and women of God into the world and disciple them. But my legacy isn't looking back at what I did. If that were the case, my legacy would only last a couple of generations and then it would be gone. But I want a legacy that lasts. A true legacy isn't about being remembered, it's about leaving an impact. Even if no one knows what left the crater, they can't deny it's there.

And I have such a short ammount of time to make that impact. I could be 80 years, or it could be 25. Regardless, it's not long and I need to get to work.