God is bigger than me

How much do you believe God is in control? That's a question I've been asking myself a lot lately. The answer I want to give is "completely." But if I look at my feelings and actions in situations, the answer ends up being "not much."

My behavior tends to indicate that everything depends on me. If I have someone in my life who isn't a Christian, it's my job to lead them in the "sinner's prayer" and move on to my next assignment. But what if God's plan for me in that person's life isn't to get them "saved?" What if God merely wants me to soften their heart to His love by demonstrating it in my own life, and then put the perfect person in their life to completely lead them to accepting Christ?

This whole idea that we're in control is prevalent in Christian culture. I've been working in youth ministry for around three and a half years, and I can't tell you the number of times that I've seen a student "get saved" 3 or 4 times only to finally meet Jesus years later. And I think this happens because well meaning people in that student's life believed that they had to do whatever it took to get that student to say a prayer to keep them from going to hell. And I should know, I was both one of those students and one of those well meaning people too up until pretty recently. I felt like if that person left church without saying that prayer, it was game over.

But here's what I'm learning: Salvation is about more than just the final result. Like everything God teaches us, it's a process. And it's a process that requires many people in many different roles. As much as I might feel like I failed if I'm not the one who leads someone to Christ, that role isn't always the most important one in the process. There's a lot of grunt work that has to be done in a person's life to show them the love of God before they meet Him; whether it's people He wants them to meet or events that need to unfold. Sometimes this process takes minutes, but, I think, most of the time it takes years. And it takes faith when your purpose is done to step back and trust that God wants that person to meet Him more than you do.

I had a roommate my junior year at Clemson that I had known since I was a junior in high school. He was a pretty fun guy; really laid back and easy going. But he was a typical southern christian who didn't know Jesus. So I'd talk to him about God whenever I could and I'd always invite him to church. I invited him to church for two years and he said he'd go a bunch of times but never actually did. This had worn me down a lot, so I had pretty much given up on the guy. But I got a call from him on Tuesday. He had heard the my grandpa passed away last week and wanted to check up on me and we talked for a little while. He told me about this girl he's engaged to and how her family goes to church all the time. Then he told me that he'd been going with them a lot lately. Then he told me that I'd be proud of him, he'd gotten right with God. And the more he went on to explain all of the differences in his life and what Jesus had done for him, it hit me: this guy had accepted Christ!

God had a purpose for me in his life. But it was just one step in the process of leading my friend to Him. God knows His children, and He knows exactly what it takes to get them to trust in Him. He knows what we need to go through to find Him. And He knows the exact right people for each part of the process that leads to Him.

Everyone has a story! And none of them begins at an invitation in a church service. And for the Christians, we all have a redemption story. One that starts in the hopeless despair of our own sin and ends in being gloriously redeemed and God calling us son or daughter. And all of our stories are interconnected. For some we play very minor parts, and for others we take the lead. But every part if absolutely vital. But for the times that we play the minor role, we have to trust that God is in control and His plan is much bigger than we can possibly conceive. We have to stick to our part in the story, even if we're not the lead. Besides the true star in every story is Jesus. He's the reason for every story anyway. We should never get over how huge an honor it is to be allowed in the same story as Him.

Also check out Josh's post here. It goes along with the idea of trusting God. His comment on Jesus coming to bring life to the dead that he made to some Europeans requires more faith and letting go of control that I think I have in me.